Growing up I had dreams and aspirations to work with kids so I wanted to be a pediatrician but in the same breath I don’t like science so that didn’t work out. After doing the morning news in highschool I decided I wanted to work in media! Journalism seemed to be the way to go so my Trini beti and I decided we wanted to go to Ryerson and live like the girls in Gossip Girl living downtown (less scandalous obviously) but that obviously did not pan out. Half way through university I decided that I liked Public Relations and Event Planning and that was it!

Here I am today sitting in my cubicle trying to figure how the heck I got here!

Taking a step back and observing my life I sort of know how but it is definitely unfortunate but not bad. I love my job – some days are better than others but that’s what happens when you have to deal with other people in general. Getting a job in media is super hard unless you have a connect or are willing to go broke trying to build experience with mini jobs, in my opinion. There were a few opportunities that I received even while in university but I was working a full time job and they wanted me to work for free basically until we put ourselves on… pardon?

Where are the paid internships? or at least the flexible non-paid ones so that I can actually have a source of income to afford my commute and possibly buying a plain bagel, lightly toasted with butter from Timmies to get me through my day? Where are the jobs where you don’t require five years of experience working in our field straight out of school? The search has been frustrating.

The reason why I’m sitting at my desk working in a different field is because the hunt got tiring. Though this doesn’t mean its over, it means that I needed some money since according to a few non-credible sources I’m high maintenance (pssssshhhh). Jordan (STiXX) mentioned to me in a conversation we had a while ago “as long as you’re consistent with networking… it doesn’t have to be like another job”, so I’m taking it as such. Slowly trying to get out and network, building meaningful relationships, asking questions, breaking out of my shell, all them good thangs.

I’m not sure if there are other people out there who read this that are going through the same thing but please share your thoughts, frustrations, and concerns…

God bless xx

morning rant

mississauga transit is complete garbage.

I needed to fill my presto card before work today and the closest place for me to fill it on my way to work is Islington station (annoying, I know). So the bus I take from home drops you in front of the subway entrance which is annoying because essentially I have to pay to go into a station to fill up my bus pass. WHAT KINDA STUPIDNESS?!

So I try to talk to the person at the subway desk and explain that I’m not going on the subway, I just wanna fill me presto card… “Sorry but you have to pay” alright womp womp. So I paid, then went to the MiWay desk to fill my card and walked onto my bus. But NOW it charged me again as if I didn’t already journey here and pay my fair. So today I’m going to be paying 3 fares and a subway trip even though I’m just going to work.

Am I the only one who sees the problem here? I mean I wouldn’t complain if Mississauga Transit was actually reliable and efficient… Okay I lied. But I’m mad at the fact that I have to pay so many times for mediocre service. 

Lord Heavenly Father please bless me with a car sooner than later because I am over this.

*takes deep breath*

-end rant-

first week

how was my first week back at school? a sucker punch to the left titty.

Realistically there is no winning with prepping to go back to school in my eyes. Way back in September I walked into school saying I’m just gonna not talk to anyone, sit at the front of class and hand in everything on time. Focus! But then my profs love group projects… *gags*. I guess it makes sense that in Public Relations we have to get used to working together but like why sooo many group projects?! Can we chill? This also meant that I needed to talk to people in school and since all of my friends I made in first year graduated I’m doomed.. or so I thought. In a nutshell I made some bomb friends and I hope I have them in all my classes that have group projects because I have hit my school friends quota for this institution and they make me happy lol.

Fast forwarding to Winter semester and I have two exams this week, a bunch of assignments due every week, and I’m hunting for a book that is well overpriced. Take me back to highschool when it costed $60 per year for school and the books were provided, on SparkNotes or in the library at NO CHARGE. I really should be studying but I’m just not feeling it. My parents would smack me if they knew I wasn’t studying…(don’t smack me if/when you read this guys, love you) but I’m a G so I’ma go study in like… 3 minutes lol.

On the bright side of my life lately I got a new job!!!! *crip walks* *heel toes* *pelvic thrusts* *gets jiggy with it* *shimmies*

.. oh and did I mention this job is a million times LESS stressful than my last job? My old senior always told me that after I left I would find better, everyone is happier when they leave my old workplace and LOOK AT GOD. I’m happy as heck. I actually have time to see my friends and my family and not wanna smack everyone in sight. Its wonderful. This is definitely helping with my “road to being positive all the time” though there have been some hiccups on this very long ride.

shoutout to the folks who are actually happy all the time and can see the positive in every situation ALL. THE. TIME.

I try my best and then God puts something in front of me and I get flustered and after some negative thoughts I realize that that was a test and I failed, lawl. I need to keep my cool.

but anyways. I think I should start reading now, it’s getting late and I haven’t even cracked open my textbook LOL.

toodles and God bless xox.

Cut From A Different Cloth .

Since I’ve been on bed rest I have been taking the time to watch movies , read , and take naps .. and I love it ! This sabbath I decided to watch some movies that I’ve heard people rave about but just never got the chance to watch ; City of God, Sleepless In Seattle , and .. something else I forgot . I guess I must be cut from a different cloth because it’s not that I didn’t like them .. I just don’t understand that hype =\

City of God. I felt the exact same way after watching Scarface, Boyz N Da Hood, Paid In Full , New Jack City, and Menace II Society ; empty . This world has become so corrupt that people are used to being selfish and thinking that the world revolves around them rather than showing empathy once in a while . People turning on their friends and family for money, power, and whatever they can . Call me sheltered but I couldn’t enjoy it the way everyone else seems to . People wonder why people are the way they are today but these ideas were planted in our minds through media a long time ago . I guess it depends on how you were raised . Some people are easily influenced by what the media tells them , some aren’t . Some people take a mix of media and what they were taught growing up to create their idea of how they plan to live their lives . Besides that the movie was extremely realistic, for a bit I felt like I was going through the struggle in Rio de Janeiro myself .

Sleepless in Seattle. Just a big question mark for me , so many red flags for me lol . If my child ever went behind my back and called a radio station to broadcast my difficulty getting over the passing of my husband I would be livid . I hope that my child(ren) and I have the same relationship that my mom and I have where they feel comfortable coming to me for anything , especially when they’re sad or grieving over such a loss as a family member . I mean all I can do is hope but I don’t like people who I’m not comfortable with knowing the ins and outs of my life . The kid gave their address out to strangers, booked a flight to New York to meet someone they don’t know, disrespects the new woman in the father’s life .. all crazy to me ! I won’t even touch the giving out their address because that seems self explanatory to me but when the son went to NY on his own …….. whoa . First of all I woulda had a heart attack and where the heck is this child getting the money from !? I just didn’t find it realistic but not all movies can or will capture that , some parts of the movie need to be exaggerated I guess =\ . For the son not liking the new woman , I can relate to that but disrespect wasn’t gonna fly in my house . My mom would box me lol . All in all, I wan’t moved by the film . I had more of a confused look on my face at the end but hey .. that’s just my outlook on it .

Now I’m not a critic so this type post is a first and hopefully last but I would appreciate more movies suggestions =] 

God Bless xo