New Level

It’s been a whirlwind of craziness but I have officially graduated from university! Through all these years pushing and stressing to be done and now that it’s over I don’t even know what to do with myself aha. Okay I’m kidding, it’s time to make this shmoney but I mean usually I’m on break prepping for summer school or the fall semester but that’s not gonna happen… For now.

God tested me through many trials and tribulations and I thought about giving up many times. But all in all life will always have its ups and downs; if you can gather your strength to push on, do so. Don’t let the devil win, EVER!

I have so many things to do now but I am extremely happy and excited for the many goals I have to complete.

It’s funny my dad said to me that now that I’m done school he’s okay to hear about me dating now lol. But really and truly, I’ve kinda used school as an excuse to not date for a while now… And many other reasons that don’t need to be discussed right now aha. But dating just seems so exhausting. I want someone and something serious and the generation I’m apart of plays too much games. Why are we trying to figure out who cares the least?! If you like me and I like you then what’s the issue !!!

*woosah* anyways. My toes are starting to tingle aha. I pray everyone has a blessed day. Positive vibes only! God bless 

Advertisements

get ready.

how crazy is it that after yeeeeears and yeeeeears of dealing with stress with money, assignments, prof’s, family, friendships and relationships I am finally graduating from university!

I got my grad tickets today and it really dawned on me… God has brought me through all the nonsense that I didn’t think I could have made it through. Even when I gave up He put me back on track and gave me the strength to carry it through. I am eternally grateful.

its days like this…

so today has been a pretty normal day… Minus the fact that I woke up with a sore throat and cramps -___-

Some days I forget that my grandma owns her car and she has a life so there will be times where she can’t let me use her car to go be ratchet with my homies ( okay not literally but… Okay ). So I did have some things to do today, going to the gym finally was one of them. So thank God I got to do that even though it was short and I got to see my mommy and little sisters which is always a blessing. 

Now I have my home girl’s dinner to go to and grandma says she’s going to visit her sister… Great. So now I gotta plan about 2 hours ahead to get to this dinner because #TransitLife. 

I got some food in my system because I didn’t eat and I’m way out of budget for spending money on food for this paycheck. I left my house a bit too early for the bus so I went back inside for a second to get a pen… I came back and was still early for the bus but it left early and zoomed of without me. 

Now I’m vex. I know I gotta roll with the punches but walking to the terminal was not in today’s plans..

SIDENOTE: gyal dem can’t find their iPods so gyal dem gotta use their phone for music but gyal dems battery life is garbage so life hawd for di gyal dem Ahlie?

Anyways so I’m walking to the terminal because I don’t have much time to catch my next bus. I’m breaking a sweat (thank God I don’t wear makeup on a consistent basis because I would look like melting molasses). I get to the terminal and my bus is there waiting for me, AINT GOD GOOD?! *praise breaks despite my rude cramps*. I have also been told that I need to smile more before I get frown lines so I was just minding my business and this older man hands me a transfer because he got two $AVING$!!

Now I’m en route and I’m content. I always tell myself that if I’m meant to go somewhere God will work it all out. It might not look like something good at the moment but we just have to be patient.

Just wanted to share that. No kind gesture goes unnoticed.

Enjoy your Sunday xox

sadderday

I should be sleeping but I’m not. Probably would make sense to do my readings since I can’t sleep but I won’t. I’m not motivated to do much at the moment.

I wanna say everything is okay but it’s not. I tweeted today that working at a gym is a blessing and a curse (if you didn’t see that then you don’t follow me and well shame on you it’s @shhhnry, kcool). I say it’s a curse because it has me looking at other peoples’ bodies wondering why I don’t have that.

NOW. Before I got this job I was comfortable with my body. I’m not the thickest or the skinniest, I don’t have a big ol’ butt, and my cellulite was close to minimal. But man I tell you one of the girls I work with haas the body of one of those fitness models you see on Instagram but she’s not overly done and she’s gorg. Like I look at her all the time and she probably thinks I’m a creep but ion curr to be honest lol.

Yeah so I don’t like that I’m doing that. So I have some personal goals and promises I wanna make to myself and document it so I can look back at it.

– love yourself, always.

-everything takes time

-do everything in life in moderation (thanks KFD)

-physical is not everything, spiritual and mental needs a lot of work.

-stop selling yourself short.

-PRAY. PRAY! PRAY!! and then stop worrying about it.

-speak only the truth and positivity.

-you can’t expect clear skin if you keep popping them pimples and touching your face, fam.

there’s probably more but at the moment my thoughts are wandering. My body isn’t the only aspect of my life I need to work on but that’s what’s on my mind at this moment. I should go sleep. Long day tomorrow and I’m going to see if I can experiment and do a decent style on my own hair(pray for me aha)

it’s the most wonderful tiiiiiiiime of the year *Andy Williams voice*

To all who actually check this blog if you don’t know already, I reside right outside of Toronto, Canada and this past weekend was the BEST time to be in the city . Why you ask ? CARIBANAAAAAA ( well technically it’s called the Scotiabank Caribbean Carnival but who is really calling it that =/ ) We also have VELD (EDM) and OVO Fest (Drake and guests like Outkast and YG, etc.) happening, so yes Toronto is always the place to be around the first weekend of August . With all that brings tourists, more celebrities, and mayhem to the city. Last year I didn’t attend any of the activities happening for a few reasons so this year was highly anticipated and I gotta say, I enjoyed every moment of it !

quick side note: while I have been going through a lot with family and myself I have been reading the Word, listening to sermons, and talking to my mom and my friends and I’ve learned so many different things about myself . One thing I have been doing is appreciating what I have and always looking for the positive in every situation . Life isn’t always going to be sunshine and rainbows but its up to us to find the positive in our situation . That has helped me to appreciate awkward and crazy situations that I’ve encountered and have helped me to handle things in the right way . I’m still a work in progress so obviously I slip up but I personally think I’m getting better .

To kick off my weekend on the Thursday I went to the OVO Bounce basketball tournament which was cool but not as exciting as I remember last year to be . It was great to run into some people I grew up with and I got to peek at a few celebrities but the games I watched on Thursday weren’t that exciting . Yes you’re here to win the tournament but I mean if its a blow out … give the crowd a show ! There were some highlights but I felt as if it was more about how bad you could beat the other team . Maybe if I got to see all the games for the whole week I’d have a different outlook but … yeah nah .

Waaay before the weekend I told myself and my friends that I was only going to the Caribana parade and maybe the Machel Montano fete afterwards but of course my friends don’t take me seriously and one of my boys bought me a ticket to Jab Jab J’ouvert which was on the Friday . This means paint, mud, oil , and powder … Thank God my hair was in braids because washing out all that nonsense to look good for the parade would have annoyed the heck outta me ! Anyways, that was really fun even though we got there extreeeemely late and the event itself was poorly organized . My friends paid $60 for VIP which I would have thought included line bypass, drinks, and food but we waited in the regular line which got rushed several times and they didn’t even check our tickets (so I bet a bunch of people that didn’t pay for the event got in smh) and I never saw the VIP area so we didn’t get any food or drinks ! But the music was great , performances were good, and all of my people got home safe .

Caribana 2012Next day I woke up late and I looked at the weather and said forget the parade… but an hour later I’m on the train headed downtown to meet with my bestfriend to head down to the parade . I’m pathetic man aha . Going to the parade with him and his boys was jokes ! I enjoyed it but I definitely love being a part of the parade rather than just busting through the barricades and watching everything from the sidelines (I’m gonna attach pictures in this post from the last time I played mas once I figure out how) . When you play mas you feel like a Caribana 2012celebrity for that day , I love it ! People taking your picture, children asking to have pieces of your costume and you get free wataaaah and food from your mas camp’s truck ! But nonetheless I met some cool people, heard good tunes and didn’t lose my bestfriend *pelvic thrust* . One problem I saw though was that they changed the route and placing of the stage for the judging of the masqueraders, which is dumb . So just when we thought the judging was over and everyone was just walking down the road,we realized we were walking right through the stage with all the masqueraders being judged.. so sorry guys xox . To make matters worse, only 3 bands went down the road for judging … what the heck =/. A lot of people complained and I would too if I paid to play mas and things were unorganized like that … thankfully I didn’t and my day was drama-free and fantastic … until my ride home .

When I took the train down to the parade I was told there is only one train that will head back to my area and that came at 7 so I left the parade at 6 because I didn’t want to get carried away with the time and miss my train . So I get to the station, buy my ticket then my phone dies . Like the OG I am I came prepped with my charger in my fanny pack so I found an outlet to plug my phone in to charge while I waited for the train but after about 5 minutes a train pulls up .. So I’m happy and thinking the train just came early and I’ll have tons of time to take a nap and be refreshed for the party I was going to later that evening … hmph . After everyone loads onto the train my intuition was telling me to get off the train but me and my lazy butt was like “nah I think we’re alright lets just take a nap” and thats what I did . Where did I wake up though ? Oakville … That is faaar from where I want to be and all I can do is laugh at this point because I knew I should have gotten off the train . Whatevs . So after quick thinking I made my way to Mississauga and took the transit back home for about 9 30 . Remember I left the parade at 6pm eh .. oh okay . No nap . No foot rub . No dinner (luckily my ride stopped at Mcdonalds, ugh I know terrible but I needed food) . I ran into the shower and got ready just in time for my ride. We had an amazing time . Machel , Kerwin , Ravi B , Farmer Nappy, and Patrice ? Yupp they made my evening . There was so much space to dance , everything seemed to be organized even though you had to wait in line to buy drink tickets and then wait in line at the bar smh (I only had water, don’t kill me) .

LET ME JUST ADD . being the only girl in the group going out to Jab Jab and the parade was the funniest part of my whole weekend ! Watch the savages scope out girls and see how women act towards them and me was hilarious . I just tried my best to stand off to the side and not be annoying \(-.-)/

This post seems pretty long to me but I guess it makes up for my lack of posting nowadays . With school coming up I want to post more now before I get swamped with work smh . Hope everyone is enjoying their summer as much as I am !

God bless xox .

tornado .

I am tired . being an adult is draining man, bring me back to middle school where my biggest worry was my unibrow and my two gapped teeth.. yes I had a unibrow . I don’t know which parent of mine placed this curse upon my life but I’m glad I learned about threading and waxing *praise breaks*

so I seem to currently be stuck . I’m in a comfortable place in certain aspects of my life and I don’t know if I’m ready to step out of my comfort zone and take a chance . The main reason for that is all the changes that has been going on in my life, like those 0 to 100 type changes … real quick . God is really testing my faith and patience and I’m slipping as of lately , in my opinion . Spending time away from home really gave me time to think, evaluate things and get motivated to change what I didn’t like in my life ; a week or so later and the flame is there but nothing has changed . As my mom always tells me, things will happen is God’s time but this is hard . Living in a generation of go-getters that believe they’re “self made” and that everything they have and have achieved is solely because they worked for it . Now don’t get me wrong, God will bless you but you have to do some of the work but I mean there are people that totally discredit Him . So when I see people just waking up and taking matters into their own hands AND it works out for them it makes me feel like crap because I haven’t been able to do that myself . A lot of the time I’ll catch myself getting upset and flustered and ready to take matters into my own hands and then God just put me right back in my place smh .

ugh this post is so sappy. long story short ITS HARD OUT HERE IN THESE SKREETS .

ohhhh p.s. my job is becoming a major cockblock to my life right now . There have been so many opportunities for me to network that I’ve had to skip out on because I have work . I’m eternally grateful for my job but my gosh I am becoming my job . I can’t wait to be this invested into my career that I love and have been hoping for. I didn’t go to school and study to just stop here . 

Speaking of career, PR hmmmm where am I going with this ? Where do I start ? Where am I going ?! *smushes face into pillow* . Every week I begin questioning my future or what stream of PR to get into, what industry… merp ah derp derp . I know I love Public Relations but there’s a lot I need to learn and my problem is I spend my time comparing my lack of experience to some people who work or are trying to start a career in media and how much they’ve done . I need to stop doing it but it’s hard for me . Everyone works at their own pace is easy to say to someone else but to actually accept the fact is difficult .

my mind is all over the place right now. wow . please is excuse me lol . oh btw, I have been consistently trying to stop using “lol” unless I actually mean it and … I guess its helping but it makes me nervous about how people perceive my messages . Ugh thats so annoying about texting . I miss face to face interactions, phone calls or even FaceTime conversations . You can’t misinterpret body language, tone of voice, our volume but you can misinterpret a mood just because someone doesn’t have a “aha” or “lol” to signify that it’s not that serious . *sigh*

Okay enough, let me talk about some good things happening in my life before I wrap this up . Let’s see … I’m currently learning Spanish/brushing up on my French (*pelvic thrust*). I got a huge water bottle that hold 8 glasses of water and have been drinking JUST water since I got back from Texas (*pelvic thrust* I will have an occasional hot chocolate or juice but water is slowly becoming my BFF), and I’ve been reading scripture more often than usual and actually understanding and relating it/applying it to my life (*pelvic thrust*) so yeah, this are great . I’m alive and well, my family is as well and I have a great group of people around me so I know with their support and God’s grace I will get through anything .

It’s Time

So today is the day I leave … *pelvic thrust* *shimmies* *gets jiggy* *logs on* *logs off*

Can you tell this is my first vacation ever ? ha . well I will be gone for a bit and I’m extremely excited to be going . Taking a break from everything here at home and having a bit of me time sounds glorious ! I’m so glad God has let this all happen because I know there was a few moments in time where this trip could have not happened for me .

 

I am terrified of going on this plane though … I’m tryna stay up long enough so I can sleep through the whole ride but … I’m  hungry and I know when the itis kicks in I’m gonna knockout =( . pray for me guys !

 

much love and God bless