I have been having such on and off days as of lately and I didn’t know how much it was taking a toll on my emotions until yesterday .
As a Christian, you’re encouraged to put your faith in God . Now I do(so I thought) but I still will go about getting things done on my own . I’m so used to getting things done myself and things going my way and it’s really hard for me to constantly rely on people . But lately it has been extremely hard to do things on my own or even get help from someone else . Either people can’t help me or they think they can and they make matters worse . An incident happened after driving home from a night out with some friends and when I woke up livid the next morning all my mom could tell me was “Keep your faith in Him” . Now I was pissed . Like .. Girl What ?
*pause* Obviously I didn’t actually say “Girl what?” to my mom but I was thinking it.. alright yeah .
Keeping faith. It is oh so hard . But I also feel like it may be because I have not been in my Word as much as I should . . I mean I read more than I have in a long time but still. . I could do better . But I’ll say this now and then in a few days I’m down in the dumps and ready to curl into a ball forever . I just really want to pause everything in my life . All my bills, school, and anything else that stresses me out and just put a stop until I’m ready . What is actually HILARIOUS is that I thought that men were one of my big factors of stress , yet with no man in my life or potentials I still feel the greys coming in ? LORD WHY =( *takes deep breath*
Keeping FAITH. I know I’m not the only person going through something like this . I feel like this is a cruel joke man , but even through it all I have that small butterfly feeling that God is going to come and make it okay . Honestly I have no other choice but to believe . I always say I’m going to go off the radar for a bit but my social butterfly side can’t stay off Twitter and Instagram =’) lol smh .
btw, check my twittaaaa @shhhnry and my Instagrizaam @OHReefaaa *pelvic thrust*
quick side note before I finally doze off . I worked my first PR volunteer gig at the 91st Royal Agriculture Winter Fair .. quite interesting . I’ll be posting about that this week .
much love and blessings .