mmm hey ..
Sewwww the other day I was talking to this guy , pretty decent conversation , and then out of nowhere things got out of hand . He was asking about my close group of friends and I told him my best friend is a male which then led him to say ,
“Nah man I can’t date a girl who has a guy ‘best friend’ b , nah nah yo . “
…… *twitches twice* …….
Numero UNO just because a girl is having a conversation with you does NOT mean they want to date you and numero Dos … what the flocka ?! Mind you this is not the first time I have ever heard this . I have heard many reasons as to why guys feel that way but personally I find them all chupid . Why can’t males and females be close friends with the opposite sex without someone thinking that they are secretly ‘getting it in’ ?
If there is one thing that bothers me to no end it is generalizing . I used to do it but I have seen the light but not many have had this luxury . But just because the few not so classy and/or mature females that you know are not able to keep their kitten in the cage does not mean all females are the same !!! When my best friend was single everyone that knew us on Twitter alone or did not know much about us from school thought we were secretly dating or doing whatever .. uh NO . I see him like a brother , yeeeeuck (Sorry , I have to emphasize LOL) . But no it was really bad . Everything that we did was over analyzed … which got extremely annoying .
At first it bothered me because all the guys I encountered were the same , in regards to not trusting me but then I realized that means there is an issue that the guy needs to deal with that is separate from me . If I do not give you a reason to not trust me with my male best friend then what is the problem ? Do you have some secrets that you would like to share ? Can you not handle having female friends ? Does this mean I gotta do a background check on all of your home girls, cousins, co workers, and classmates ? (lool kidding, kinda) But honestly , we’re young adults now its time to grow up . If you feel that you personally would not be able to handle having a close friend of the opposite sex then Voice it to your partner and work it out from there . Minor things like the gender of their closest homies should not stop you from pursuing/dating someone .
After a few minutes of ‘arguing’ with the guy he asked me ,
“But why does he have to be a guy ? What’s wrong with your girlfriends ?”
Listen , its not like I went on a wild goose chase to find a male best friend … it just happened that way lol . I have girl friends who I can come to for any and everything and then there are topics that need a males perspective . If I wanna buy a gift for my dude , sports insights, video games , and relationship advice are just a few examples . Sometimes a friendship is so easy to build and you end up telling the person your whole life without you knowing it , my best friend is one of those people . Which is rare ! Though lots of guys want to deny it , SOME of you guys chat as much as us women do if not more . “Who’s that lightskin ting you just tweeted ?” “That girl from the club last night was beeeat fom” “ouuu who is that ting that you just followed on IG fam ? You know her ?! Thats you ?! I can’t holla?” “That girl has a best friend that will let the whole crew hit , let me swerve .” liiike chill . I hear some of you in public and I just roll with laughter . Having a male best friend is basically the same as having a female one just there are some things we don’t discuss , simple . So there is nothing WRONG with my girlfriends , if you see the value in a friendship with someone no matter the race , gender , height or whatever it shouldn’t stop you from keeping that close .
Now this Also goes for women too , but it all comes down to trust . Many females read too much into things ( I have been guilty of this) and we say we trust guys but once he likes a pretty girl’s picture on Instagram (IG) or retweets a girl with tons of followers on Twitter all that ‘trust’ goes out the window . Though some guys are trifling not all of them are . If your man says his best friend is a female let it be . Give your man, side ting , bae , or whatever you call him a chance . Get to know her and maybe learn why they are so close . It isn’t like he’s out there messing around with the girl … and if he is the trifling kind and is messing with her that is a whole new post to get into .
To sum this condensed rant up , there is nothing wrong with having a best friend of the opposite sex IF you and your significant have your mind right .. but ya’ll don’t hear me though .